When you figure all that out, let me know because I'm wrestling with some of the same stuff.
Let me know too about the holidays part, what you find works for your family. I don't feel the need to celebrate Christmas if I have a family (ya know, because I'm a devout agnostic, not Christian). Here's a great idea that could be modified for your needs: Years ago I saw an episode of Oprah where the guest was a woman, an author I'm sure, that decided to take her family on a trip to join in on charity work during each Christmas holiday season. They would build infrastructure/houses in developing areas in other countries and whatnot. She was giving her family so much more than gifts and vacuous Christmas tradition from this, and she was a good Christian!!! This was inspired by the death of one of her children and her family's subsequent grief. She wanted so much more for her family, especially because they already had so much.
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