Saturday, May 31, 2008

What I've Been Working On

I haven't posted any crafting stuff lately. I joined a flickr group but can't figure out how to add my photos to the pool! Agghh!

But I have been faithfully crafting during naptimes and any other time I can sit down for a quick second.

The boys have a toy basket in the Fam-tuary and so often they sit at my feet and play with their stuff.

Recently S got them so long beaded necklaces, Mardi Gras-style and some random monkeys with bananas and sea creatures too. It's great because they were constantly saying 'beads' and trying to reach up and grab mine. Now they have their own!

Remember how I said I don't like making earrings? I was so wrong!

I think the problem was I had been trying to experiment with other, more frustrating materials and was trying to use up beads I had on hand that I didn't really like and so naturally I was frustrated with the end result.

I took some online classes on jewelry making and realized I have most of the basic techniques down already I just have to practice and play around with different combinations.

I personally wear a lot of black, white, silver, and brown earrings. Simple, dangly designs that go well with a lot of things.

I received a lovely packet of beads in the mail from my BFF which inspired me to make a cute pair of mod white earrings.

Then I offered to make a pair for a friend and she requested something clear, silver and/or black and dangly. I had so much fun making them that it inspired a few more pairs that were a blast to make.

I even went back and fixed a pair I had previously made that I wasn't 100% happy with. (the clear buttons)

I also made a necklace for my pal, Chas and added a green wood circle bead to the keychain I made for my mom. I'm almost through with a red and black necklace that I plan on giving to a friend.

The third time seems to be the charm for my black knitted bag, it's going well and I'm happy with the shape. I hope to have it finished within the next couple of days. I have some handles I'm dying to try out on them. I think they will be really cute.

The final thing on my plate is my lip balm series. I have the names and flavors locked down and the recipe I'm going to use. I just need to try it out and decide whether any of them will be colored. I also need to figure out labels for the tubes.

I'm also reading Cokie Roberts' book Founding Mothers. (I'm also anxious to start her newest book) I'm not too far into it but I love her dishy, wry writing style and it's incredible to read about women's lives in the 17 and 1800's. (I've never really bothered to read much about that time period outside of school. It's all pretty basic if you have, but I just have never taken the time)

I read one excerpt of a woman's diary who had one child and was tearing her hair out. She wrote something that was the equivalent of 'I can't even handle one, what am I going to do when I have ten??'

It was common then to have a child every two years or so for about ten years, ending up with about 5-7 kids since it was expected that two or three would die from some horrible illness. I can't even imagine.

I'm almost ready to sell my creations, I was just trying to make sure they were done well so they would last and be comfortable to wear. It's nice to be in the "practice" stage because I can give them away as gifts and get feedback from my friends before I charge someone money for them. I'm feeling pretty confident now!!

Anyway, I just wanted to update in case ya'll thought I had given up my little projects. ;)

Get Over Yourself!!!

I'm a little embarrassed by yesterday's body-image outburst. I am lame.

I don't know what came over me. I think it's because I've been so sedentary lately (all of my hobbies involve me sitting on my ass) and eating really badly.

Of COURSE I don't look like I'm 17 anymore. I'm not. I'm 31 and I've had twins. I wouldn't trade that for all the firm skin in the world.

I DID go get a new swimsuit today, though. Because the reason I felt insecure was clearly because I had an unflattering suit, not because I've been getting zero exercise lately. I was feeling guilty about the splurge (I thought it was going to cost $16.99 for each piece) but it was only $8 each for some reason. I guess they were having a swimwear sale?

So, tomorrow I'm going to yoga to focus on being calm and strong and to use my sleepy muscles. The teacher I go to doesn't let me slack, which I love because my natural tendency is to half-ass it.

How Do You Tell Them Apart?

I get that question often, when people realize I have twins.

I always say 'I never get them confused, they look totally different to me.'

Well...My Lee has decided to stop wearing his signature button-down shirts and is now opting for Moomers-style novelty t's...and it's really throwing me.

Just now I went into the Fam-tuary (garage) and saw M playing quietly. 'Where's LeeLee?' I asked him. 'Outside' he said without looking up from his toys.

I ran to the doors...all locked. LeeLee! Where are you???

I ran into the bathroom and there was...Moomers. It had been LEELEE in the garage! Grrrr!!!

Weekend Wrap Up: Friday

Over here the weekend starts on Friday because that is when S's first day off is.

We hung out around the house all day then decided in the late afternoon to go swimming.

This was the first time I've gone swimming so far this year and it started off a bit..rocky.

S insisted that we go in to a shallow spot near the front instead of the 'kiddie' area at the other end. I went in the frigid water holding my Moomers hand (we've been especially close lately)

It was really slippery and I was feeling a bit panicky. We decided to make our way to the other end and as we were getting out, M got a little scared and asked me to pick him up.
"Uppy, Mama" I did and as I took my next step I slipped and fell right onto a woman who was sitting with her husband and small child.

Hey Mamas out there: have you ever fallen with your baby? Isn't amazing how some crazy primal instinct takes over and forces you to fall in the most painful way possible for yourself in order to spare your child?

I ended up on my arse with my knee folded under me, holding Moomies up over my head, above the water.

I was FURIOUS at S for suggesting that we go in there. He had no idea that I had fallen and was trying to make amends but I wasn't having it.

As we walked to the other side I became acutely aware of the gentle jiggle of my Winter thighs. These thighs are SO not ready for June.

With each step I took I regretted every 'ahhh, the boys are asleep I deserve a treat' snack I've eaten the past month.

I feel pretty happy with my body...FULLY CLOTHED but in public with two kids and nothing to cover my mama thighs but a freaking TANKINI I start to feel a bit insecure.

Everywhere I looked there was a young girl with glossy hair and toned thighs. Luckily in the kids area I was able to get a little relief from that.

It's like they said said 'hey you, in the mock-skirted one piece, you belong here in this section' and that was where we headed, dragging our stroller, floaties and towels.

I felt very vulnerable. 'do I look disgusting? are any pubies popping out of my suit?'

Last year I was so happy when I bought that swimsuit. I thought 'yeah I know it's a tankini but it's cute!' but today I did NOT feel cute at all. Next time I'll be prepared. I will wear a different one and even if I show more of my skin at least I won't look like I'm trying to hide anything. I'll get a bikini wax...or at least survey the situation BEFORE I get to the pool.

I think I was covered but it's like going to a job interview and realizing you may have forgotten to put on deodorant. It's distracting.

I was sitting on my towel with my Mooms just thinking 'I am practically naked and am IN PUBLIC! Aghh!!' then I looked over and saw a topless woman on the hill above me. Well, no ok. She was naked. I was just scantily clad.

I'm always trying hard to love myself as- is and be proud of all my body has accomplished but everyone has their low self-esteem days. Today was just one of mine.

But despite everything I did manage to relax and enjoy the weather and the pool and my family. We ended up having a great time and the boys wore themselves out.

M was so excited that he was able to float with his life jacket on, he told me he was a boat and splashed around as he floated on his back.

LeeLee was much more cautious, which surprised me. He clutched S's hand nervously.

After we left we let them run around in a field next to the parking lot.

Our neighbor gave them some new toys, a cement mixer and an army Jeep. They've been fighting over it.

S promised him we'd go to the thrift store to look for another and the look on his face was priceless. I can't believe they get so excited about buying things already. It fill me with dread, thinking about what's to come as they get older. 'Yes, Papa. Buy.' Yikes.

As we were leaving we saw a guy carefully placing branches on a tree trunk. It seemed like he was talking to/making a home for the squirrels.

Topless ladies, the squirrel whisperer, falling on top of a was quite an adventure.

Friday, May 30, 2008

Welcome, Jolie!!!

My friends had their second baby girl, Jolie Triston this morning! Congratulations!!!!

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Temporary Freedom

all alone.

Well, I am always complaining that I get zero alone time and now that I have it I am at a loss for what to do with it.

I have so much I need to do, put away laundry, clean the bathroom, plus I need a shower and probably a brow tweeze. But I don't know where to begin. I don't want to waste my precious minutes doing mundane housewifery but it is stuff that needs to be done at some point.

The boys took a pathetic excuse for a nap today and I am feeling it. S came home and rescued me by taking them for a bike ride at the park. It's already beginning to get dark so I probably don't have too much time.

It's so funny, I complain but the second my babers are out of my sight I want them back.

A New Record!

I just noticed that I have officially beat my old record for number of posts in a month. Last month was the old record, 80 posts! I figured there was no way I'd ever top that and didn't even try but somehow despite feeling like I was blogging less this month, I beat the record.


Back when I was first starting this blog I mentally committed to posting at least 15 entries a month. FIFTEEN A MONTH! I don't know if it's good or bad that I'm blogging so much now...

Update: Moomers

Well, we all slept great last night. No vomiting, thankfully. Moomers was still warm when I went to bed but when we woke up about 1/2 an hour ago his temperature was back to normal.

He's jumping around and playing like normal with LeeLee and they both begged for chocolate Elmo cakes (see below for recipe!) first thing, so I guess he's feeling better. ;)

I gave them both a bath last night and dressed them for bed, usually we take baths in the mornings and usually if I choose their jammies they rebel and insist on choosing their own. But last night they let me put on matching t-shirts from the Eric Carle museum and little shorts. (sometimes they want to wear jeans or pants to bed!) This morning when they woke up and realized they were matching they got really excited and pointed at each other saying: "Two!! Me, too!" They've been really twin-y lately and it's very sweet.

Even though M is feeling better, I think I will still 'quarantine' him and not make any playdates for a few days or take him out in public. Don't want to accidentally get anyone else sick!

Recipe: Choclolate Elmo Cakes!

These vegan cupcakes were such a huge hit at our house I thought I'd post the recipe (with a vanilla variation)

325 degrees for 22 minutes, makes 12 large cupcakes or 24 mini cupcakes

2/3 c. soymilk, vanilla
1/2 tsp. apple cider vinegar (I only had white vinegar, but it seemed fine!)
2/3 c. light agave nectar for vanilla cupcakes, dark for chocolate
1/3 c. canola oil
1 1/2 tsp. vanilla extract
1 1/3 c. flour for vanilla, 1 c. flour & 1/3 c. cocoa powder for chocolate
3/4 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. baking soda
1/4 tsp salt

In a large bowl, mix soymilk and vinegar let set to ferment.
Beat in agave, oil, vanilla. Sift in dry ingredients. Fill 2/3 with batter, bake for 22 minutes and let sit for 1 hour before frosting or eating (if you can!) The flavor develops more after they are cooled.

These were really, really tasty. I will double the recipe next time because 12 cupcakes is just too few around here! The were so rich and moist they could easily be baked in an 8x8 dish and called brownies.

Sick Boy

Today when I was putting the boys down for their nap I noticed that Moomers was suddenly burning up with fever.

I dug out our thermometer and took his temperature: 101.3--ok. I asked him how he felt and, hearing the concern in my voice, said 'owie.' Your head? "yes." Your tummy? "yes." Your little toe? "yes." Ok that narrowed that down.

I'm always hesitant to give them Tylenol when they have a low-grade fever because I do want for their bodies to fight off whatever it needs to, but I gave him a tiny dose anyway. It immediately knocked out the fever and they went to sleep.

LeeLee, of course begged for some too and was almost hysterical when I refused.

All morning they begged me to make 'chocolate Elmo cakes' (where do they come up with this stuff??) and I assured them that I would make them while they slept.

I cleaned up in preparation for baking, but they woke up before I had the chance to start making cupcakes. They were very sad to be greeted with soup and toast instead of cake.

While they ate I baked a batch of vegan chocolate cupcakes, sugar free. (sweetened with agave nectar.) My vegan friend, M gave me the recipe over the phone the other night. I bake all the time but had never made vegan cupcakes so I felt a bit out of my element. They turned out pretty well although my beautiful fluffy cupcakes fell a bit and instead of a high dome they ended up with a bit of a deflated appearance. They tasted yummy, even unfrosted (cakes don't usually last long enough to get frosted around here) and I happened to have Elmo cupcake liners on hand so I did, in fact make chocolate Elmo cakes-- as promised.

Moomers seemed to have a decent appetite but his fever came right back after a few hours. I didn't notice any other symptoms but then he started having loose poopies. I am hoping he just ate something weird (sometimes they get a hold of a cup of goat milk that's been out all morning, ew...) and isn't developing something like this. I guess if he gets a rash in the next few days I'll know.

I spent the evening snuggling a sad, sick Moomies and feeling a bit overwhelmed. I emptied probiotic capsules into a helping of organic applesauce before bedtime and they each ate it right up. I hope that helps. I hope he doesn't vomit on me in the middle of the night. That is my least favorite part of parenting, the middle-of-the night warm vomit bath.

I hate it when my boys are sick but there is something so lovable and sweet about a sick little guy. So snuggly.

They've been really into finger games lately, the Thumbkin game being number one although they only want to play with pointer. They beg me to draw little faces on their fingers (happy for M, sad for L for some reason) and sing over and over again 'where is pointer?' they love it when he 'goes away' and Moomies loves to make his tiny fingers kiss mine before hiding them behind his back. M loves it most of all and it makes my heart soar to hear his tinkly laughter and his little voice saying 'run away.'

I hope my tiny man gets better soon and that he doesn't take the whole family out with some weird tummy virus. (he told me several times all night that his "gummy" hurt so I think that's what it might be)

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Wordless Wednesday--My THIRD Belle & Burger Skirt!

Get yours here!
(veiny Mama legs not included!)

This is your life!

My fellow mama-blogger friend, A did an amazing meme recently. (that's her drawing to the left)

I can't draw to save my life but I love the idea. It compares different stages of your life. She used the ages 16, 20 and now, 29.

Here is my word version (even though it's more entertaining with pictures...maybe I'll dig some up for proof!)

Age: 16

Year: 1993

Weight: 112

Occupation: I was still in high school, either a sophomore or junior and worked at a computer store owned by my dad's friend.

Relationship Status:
I had spent all that year and the year before being secretly in love with this guy
back then he looked like this --but with a longer goatee and no tattoos yet(he's the one on the right. the guy on the left is my beloved deceased friend, Anthony who I also met that year) then later started dating a guy who was even MORE awkward than I was, and lost my virginity to him. He was a total douche, though and I cringe when I come across pictures of us. He looked like someone's creepy uncle. (even though he was only 18!)

Outfit you'd most likely find me in: Maroon high top Converse, baggy jeans, weird leotard/grownup onesie top (they were popular then for some reason!) or some awkward oversize t-shirt. I was very self-conscious about my body and did whatever I could to not call attention to it. I wore the leotard-thing because it made me feel like a dancer! Ha! (I was in dance but I am so clumsy AND get crazy stage fright.)

I would be carrying: My lunch money in my pocket, a lame mini- backpack with my pen and journal.

Other physical details: I had super-thick brows that I tried to tame without success. I had really, really long dyed red hair. I was trying to get the perfect 'My So-Called Life' red.
I didn't wear makeup but had pretty good skin.

Age: 20

Year: 1997

Occupation: I worked at the Fort Mason Youth Hostel in San Francisco and The Body Shop in the nearby Marina District.

Relationship Status: I was dating my future ex-husband. (he's the one on the right. the guy on the left is Ron, my super- crush from when I was sixteen!) We had been together two years and were ENGAGED! I was so not mature enough to be engaged, but there is a really sweet story that involves train-hopping that made me want to marry him...I just shouldn't have actually gotten married!

Weight: Between 127-132

Outfit you'd most likely find me in: A Food Not Bombs or punk rock band t-shirt, jeans, Docs.

I would be carrying: A wallet that says "White Trash" with an attached chain, a black backpack from the Army/Navy store covered with punk rock patches holding a notebook filled with my 'zine ideas, a Descendents cd and a Vonnegut novel.

Other physical details: Poor Greg. He was with me during the roughest fashion years of my life! For some reason (oh, wait, yeah. my dad died and after that I totally freaked out) I had shaved my head and had varying degrees of the punk-rock girlfriend hairdo as it grew out and I shaved it off again. That year I had bleached my hair. Painful and unattractive! I hadn't discovered makeup yet and when I did it was the wrong shade of lipstick. My skin was not great, I had a lot of hormonal/stress breakouts. I had four tattoos by then ( 3 by Ron despite my telling him at 16 that I "wasn't a tattoo kind of person") and six piercings aside from my ears. I also wore jewelry like a ball-chain necklace with a padlock on it (tough and classy!) thick silver rings on most fingers including my thumb and these weird stretchy silver bangles that were popular then.

Age: 31

Year: 2008--now

Occupation: Mostly Mama, sometimes esthetician/makeup artist/skincare educator.

Relationship Status: Married for the second (and last) time.

Weight: Between 127-132 (my weight is pretty constant and only goes way up or down when I am depressed or pregnant)

Outfit you'll most likely find me in: A-line skirt (probably made by a friend), tank top or fitted t-shirt, ballet flats.

I will be carrying: A big mom purse with about six lipsticks and glosses, snacks and diapers and wipes for the boys, my cell phone and iPod and digital camera (and occasionally two two year olds although I'm not really strong enough to carry both at once anymore.)

Other physical details: I am far more jiggly now than in my firmer-yet-far-more-insecure teens and twenties. I also have a mom tummy but way better brows. (when I have time to tend to them) I also know exactly what is going on with my skin and how to fix it, unlike when I was younger and had no clue. (this doesn't mean my skin always looks great because it absolutely does not. Diet, stress, etc. really mess with my skin and I don't always take the time to take care of it. I don't have the type of skin that is beautiful all by itself.) I'll also be wearing a wedding ring, two silver rings, a pair of dangly earrings (maybe made myself) and a necklace that I probably made. I also now have about 11 tattoos (with more likely to come, at least touch-ups and/or cover-ups) and no piercings other than my ears.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Wabi Sabi: Imperfect Beauty

wabi sabi flower

A couple of years ago I read an article on Wabi Sabi. I thought the name sounded silly (but not as silly/annoying as "shabby chic !") but the concept is an exact description of our household philosophy. We have many, many found objects and cast-offs as well as things we purchased second hand.

Our family motto may as well be: 'can you believe someone was throwing this out??!"

I also am reminded of Wabi Sabi when I am making something by hand. I get very caught up in perfection, thinking I couldn't or shouldn't sell something that I view as flawed in some way, even if I am the only one that can really see the flaws.

I am trying to embrace the idea of imperfection as nonetheless beautiful in all aspects of my life. Myself, my stuff, my creations.

I just brought in an old desk my neighbor was giving away along with a dresser and metal shelf. The dresser now lives in S's room and the shelf happily resides in the garage and has a lot of my work supplies on it.

The desk had been outside but I was itching to bring it in. Today I did. I like it as is but think I will still refinish the top in some way.


Ok, so the whole Brangelina thing really bugs me, but seriously...could there BE any more perfect girl for my Moomers? She's adorable! (and we really should try to marry up, no? ;)

Mama Mafia

I gave my friend, B the necklace I made for her last week. I think I forgot to take a picture, so I'm happy she did!

I have one more to make but I got one wrong letter. Grrr...these were really fun to make, though even though B's turned out better than mine! ;)

Hair Pie

Damn, it was hard to put those little munchkins down for their nap today. They were clearly tired and they ate beforehand but they just got really wound up for some reason. They started playing games with each other while nursing...a big no-no since it hurts me.

Today they started swatting each other's heads and grabbing their hair then pretending to eat it. Again while nursing. Teeth + my boobs = no bueno.

It took an hour of story-reading, threats and bribes to get them to settle down and go to sleep. But now they are asleep. Free at last! Please, please, please let this be a long nap!

A Word About Blue Mama

What does that mean anyway? That I am depressed? That I hate being a mama?

No. The boys actually came up with that name for me and that is why I use it here on my blog title and elsewhere.

I do like to vent/complain but that's beside the point. ;)

When the boys started learning their colors they assigned colors to EVERYTHING. I became Blue Mama, S is Orange Papa and their favorite blankets (who are twin girls ;) are Yellow Lady and Blue Lady.

They use that name for me less now and sometimes I'm other colors 'white Mama, yellow Mama' but usually they go back to Blue Mama.

S didn't even realize why I was using it until I reminded him, that forgetful Orange Papa. ;)

So anyway, for any of you who ever wondered...that is why I am Blue Mama. Because of my silly, adorable, precocious boys.



I had to rip out my second attempt at my black purse last night. I was close to being finished again, but I just didn't like the shape. I cast on too many stitches yet AGAIN. I think I just haven't been paying attention.

So, yet again I will start over sometime today.

Back to the Grind

S went back to work today. It feels a bit weird after having him home all week. I set my alarm so we could get up and see him before he left. I know the boys would have freaked out if they woke up and he was gone.

I'm finding myself looking around the house in confusion. What was it that I normally did after he left? My routine has completely escaped me. The boys are happily watching Mary Poppins, a gift from their Papa, who hit our favorite thrift store's half off sale yesterday. They get so excited when he buys them presents, they insisted on sleeping with their new videos on their pillows all night long.

Last night we went to one of our favorite nearby Mexican restaurants for dinner. I was starving and really wanted a pleasant night out to end our week together. The boys were in a rowdy mood and didn't want to sit still and our waiter sucked. He didn't offer booster seats for the boys, we had to go hunt them down, he didn't take our menus or clear any dirty dishes and when he came to our table he was rushing around so much I couldn't even order a margarita. Grrr!!!

The patio was filled with young, carefree types who were talking about their leisurely days and plans for the evening. I found myself filled with brief longing...I wanted to go back to someone's house and play some stupid game, get drunk and sleep it off alone this morning. But, alas...I had to go home and put two little boys to bed, wake up with them and be in charge of them plus the care and cleaning of our house.

This is my life and I chose it and do love my family and our home but sometimes I do miss those days. Thankfully I did have my entire twenties to myself. I saw a picture of San Francisco in a magazine the other day and I felt a quick stabbing panic to my heart: "I miss my old life! What am I doing here, in Texas with all these responsibilities??! Why am I not in glorious San Francisco wearing wool coats in June and frolicking about?"

San Francisco, CA

If I did still live there I would no doubt be wondering when I was going to have a family and daydreaming about Texas, my home state. Blah blah blah.

Monday, May 26, 2008

Crafty Mama Monday: If I'm Sitting' I'm Knittin'

Since S has been home all week I've gotten to do a lot of crafty stuff.

Today I'm just working on my knitted purse, I hope to finish with it tonight or tomorrow, at least the knitted part.

I've also been playing around with copper wire in my earrings. Earrings aren't overly super-exciting for me. I love making rings and necklaces, though so I may only do earrings as a compliment to certain necklaces.

I'm also thinking a bit ahead to Father's Day. Last year I made t-shirts for the boys to wear. They were cute but I know I could do better this year. I don't think I want to do shirts again, though so I'm thinking of my options. I also have a few good gift options for S and I'll probably make the same breakfast I did last year, Creamy Strawberry Stuffed French Toast Hearts. Yum. (It was a Rachael Ray recipe for Mother's Day last was supposed to be something that kids can make for their moms. I like it for Father's Day too and we all loved it)

I'm itching to go to the craft store, but S is gone and the boys are asleep so I'm just going to keep knitting.

This week I also want to refinish the top of a cute white vintage desk we found. I was thinking of Mod Podge-ing some fabric (in green maybe, I have to look around) onto it. I think I am going to put it in the living room and use it as our mail/correspondence table. We've had a sewing table there for years but I want to use it in the garage to actually sew with.

What are you working on?

Memorial Day

Me and my little Moomers just got out of the bath. I have a clean house. I got a good night's sleep. I've had some caffeine. Life is good today.

No headache or major stress today. I'm sad that S is going back to work tomorrow. The boys and I are really going to miss him. Luckily with the holiday weekend it will be a shorter week.

Speaking of Memorial Day, I'm listening to conscientious objectors to the war, Marine corporals and other veterans of Iraq and Kuwait testifying before Congress. It is so sad. They are really brave to testify. It's really powerful to hear these men who have been to war and have seen some horrible things, a lot of them perpetrated by the US talking about why we should not still be at war.

Etsy Online!!

Yet another article on Etsy! I love this frugal living site, so I was excited to see this article pop up on my Google reader. Check it!

Sunday, May 25, 2008

My Secret Dirty Fantasies

During certain times of the month (like now *ahem*) I like to torture myself by fantasizing about things I absolutely cannot have.

I found myself doing it just now. I want something SO BAD but have no way on Earth to get it right now.

What is the object of my desire???

The Thinking Place

I come up with some of my best ideas and solutions to problems when I am nursing the boys to sleep.

It also has the added benefit of helping them fall asleep.

If I am lost in thought as they nurse I am usually relaxed and unaware of the time passing as much. If I am focused on all the things I need/want to do once they pass out then I am usually tense and agitated and it takes them FOREVER to drift off.

Sometimes, though I do fall asleep with them instead of getting up and acting on all those great ideas I came up with. (This is only bad if I don't remember them in the morning. )

We were so cranky and worn-out tonight that we started the bedtime routine when it was still light out.

Last Day to Enter LiveMom Giveaway!!

You have until midnight tonight to leave a comment on LiveMom to win a set of 3 Juice Beauty lip balms.

Not too many people have commented so far, so you'll have a good chance of winning!

Weekend Wrap Up:Whole-Family Playdate

On Friday we hung out with our new family-friends D & A and their son, S.

We hung out at the sprinkler park and then walked to a nearby hamburger joint.

All three of the boys ran around like little maniacs while we tried to have "adult" conversations.

There was a guy at the park taking surreptitious pictures of the kids playing in the sprinklers which REALLY freaked me & A out but the men thought we were being crazy.

I thought it was creepy and odd. Why would a grown man with no foul motives want pictures of kids playing in sprinklers? If he were taking pictures for some sort of publication you would think he would just be taking pictures outright, but he had his camera at his feet and was snapping the pictures all in a row while looking around faux-casually. Just thinking about it makes me angry and a bit scared.

I wish I had have had the nerve to just go ask what he was doing. He was wearing ipod headphones and not making any eye contact so he clearly wasn't inviting interaction.

But alas, that was a very small fragment of our evening. We had a nice time and it's funny to feel instantly comfortable with our new friends. I feel like we've known them forever already and it's only been a few weeks.

Mistakes Were Made

Last night I started my fourth recycled bag purse. It is black and will be the largest of the bags I've made so far.

The problem was, I cast on WAY too many stitches and ended up knitting what would have been a trash bag suitcase upon completion.

I was knitting in the round and didn't take into consideration the fact that I was using larger needles than with my other bags.

By the time I really looked at it I had knit quite a lot of it. If I had paid closer attention, I would have been finished with it.

But instead I had to rip out 2 hours worth of knitting. So it goes. It's not too painful, really. These knit up pretty quickly. I have some plans for my newer bags that I'm excited about. They will be the main items on my Etsy page, once I have enough of them. Stay tuned!


I'm feeling very raw and sensitive today. S and I stayed up late last night watching a movie and then dragged out a bunch of home movies of the boys.

It made me feel very sad and vulnerable. Those little boys. We've been in charge of their care for a few years now and seeing them so small was a bit overwhelming.

Our house was pre-paint job (aka still crazy clown colors) and pretty clutter-y, we still had Leo the world's most annoying dog and our little boys were tiny baby chicks.

I did see one video of me doing some knit & nurse action...I felt like I didn't do anything crafty or for myself in those early years, but I was wrong. It just passed by in such a blur.

It's easy to forget how small they once were. They are so verbal and silly and rowdy now. I really feel privileged to have had the chance to get to know these little people better than I have ever known anyone. I feel so close to them yet I know that these times are fleeting. One day I won't be able to just lean over and kiss their elbow or snuggle my face into their soft baby tummies.

One day there will be a wall between us, they will move away from me, they will turn away to begin to create a life that doesn't include me first and foremost. I know those days are a ways away, but I felt like THESE days were a ways away just recently and they've gone by in the blink of an eye.

Friday, May 23, 2008

Policewoman in China Breastfeeds Nine Hungry Babies

I read this story this morning and I thought it was so incredible. I also read this article that discussed it and it asked if I would do the same if I were lactating (which I am ;) in the presence of so many needy babies.

I absolutely would. I think just hearing and seeing so many scared and hungry infants would make my boobs ache with milk.

I feel a whoosh of milk just when I hear random babies cry in the supermarket.

Stories like this really make me feel proud to be a breastfeeding mama.

Finished Stuff

Here are some photos of the stuff I've been working on the past few days.

The earrings I made today during naptime: one pair is clear buttons and black beads on a black cord, the other is black and red beads on a wire hoop.

I finished my third plastic bag purse, this one is tan and green with bamboo handles.

I also finished making "yarn" for my fourth plastic bag purse, this one will be black.

I have plans for a few new necklaces. One I've started and will be another "maxi necklace" meaning it will be super-long and can be worn as four short strands, two medium strands or one really long strand. I prefer to wear it short with four strands but it looks really cute a bit longer with two strands.

The other is a remake of a necklace I had: it was a turquoise, black and red necklace with a Kali hammered silver pendant. I love all of it except the black beads. I always thought they made the necklace look cheap and too bulky. I already took it apart, which I regret because I could have done a before and after. I plan on doing smaller black beads but keeping everything else more or less the same. I'm looking forward to this because once it's finished it will be a necklace I will actually wear.